Rotting scalp

My scalp seems to be decomposing on my head. Every time I scratch my scalp I seem to get gungy dead skin cells on my hand. I told my sister Ems this over skpe and she said she thought she was going to be sick. I feel like I'm going to be sick writing this. It's oddly satisfying though, like when you go to the beach and then later you discover sand all over your scalp and you can scratch it off. But I have to be careful that people don't catch me enjoying a good scratch, like a dog. I can't for the life of me take a photo which captures this but my housemate Amy took this quite informative one.

My boss David has started telling the authors that come to see him about my hair project. It is slightly embarrassing! I told Ems that people usually say that it really doesn't look that bad for three weeks without washing, but my mum leaned over and said: "they're lying".

Bad day

Eurrgh it's looking awful. Sodden, dank, stringy. And there aint that much more to say about it.

Weekend

I forgot to take a photo of myself yesterday- so annoying. It would have been slightly more interesting than usual yesterday as well since I actually had to go out. I put on a lot of make-up and a very nice top but the barnet looked simply dire. It was so bad that after having got ready I stuck my head under the shower to try to see if I could make it better. I think I'm abusing the rinsing thing though- it does improve the hair but the results are lasting for less and less time and today again, the hair just looks absolutely horrrrible.

Today I went with my boyfriend and his two housemates and their girlfriends for a triple date lunch. We went to a German pub and I ordered a repellent goulash which featured a sea of gristly meat in spicy sauce topped with enormous raw dumplings, the size of cricket balls. Maybe the chef was away and the bar staff were doing the lunches, but I'm pretty sure those dumplings should have been cooked in some way. Anyway, it was a very nice day, although it was bitterly cold and I had a head that looked like it it been rubbed with a big slab of lard. Only the roots though, not the ends, which remain as dry as crispbreads. I was going to say crisps but that's just too complimentary.

Moles

Today I had two moles removed and it was great fun! Me and my mum went off to the city to a proper plastic surgery clinic to get them done. I was hoping to see some miserable, fragile girls waiting to have their boob jobs done but in fact I seemed to be the only patient in the building. The doctor was very nice and lavished attention on me and we had a good laugh. I saw one of my moles floating in a jar and it looked very tiny. I thought I might ask to keep one but then maybe that is a bit too disgusting, even for me. £430 later and I was out having a nice eggnog latte, courtesy of madre. An excellent morning all round. And get this, he said that excessive sun exposure only doubles your chances of skin cancer- not too bad!

Foolishly I took this photo after taking my make-up off so I don't look my best. Piss-holes in the snow as mummy says...

More of the cows lick

Quotes from my father: "Why do you have to do a blog? I wish you'd wash it." "I'm appaulled".

I'm having a mole off tomorrow morning so I'm afraid I have to get to bed now.

Head of two halves

I'm going to post two photos today to show the difference between the front of my head and the back. I am feeling really quite good about the front. It looks alright, quite dull and almost greyish but not lank and greasy anymore. The back, on the other hand, is still really vile. And the top of my head is incredibly itchy. I can't see it but I know I've got dandruff there. Sometimes I have the sensation that there are bugs crawling all over my scalp. It's horrid.

I bumped into my boss in the street earlier (whilst carrying a huge 16 pack of loo roll under one arm, which is always embarrassing) and he agreed the hair is on the up.  It's good of him to say because I hadn't seen the back at that point and it ain't good.

Bald

It now seems that I'm going bald. My mum took this photo which gives a rather disturbing glimpse of the top of my scalp beneath my hair. This is a good photo though, it has it all: cows lick, volume, grease mongering round the sides, and now a lovely bald patch. If we'd just managed to capture some flakes of dandruff it would have been quite special.

The general consensus though is that the hair is actually getting a bit better. I've had a few nods of tentative encouragement from people. I went and saw the film Chico and Rita tonight with Jack and my friends Jess and Harry. Jess gave me her tentative nod, but only shortly before jerking her head away in complete horror when I looked over her shoulder at something. She claimed it was a joke but I'm pretty sure I saw a look of genuine revulsion in her eyes.

My friend Hanna, who knows some hippies, suggested rinsing the hair every day, and failing that, tying a 40s style headscarf on. But I really cannot be bothered to get this revolting damp/dry mass of hair wet every morning (imagine trying to blow dry a greased-up horses's tail, it's a bit like that). And my other trouble is that all the vintage shops round where I work in Covent Garden are so frickin expensive I can't bring myself to part with a fiver for a polyester square of fabric from the 90s. I will man up and do it though, now I've realised I'm a bit bald. Expertedly tied headscarf coming soon. 

Cows Licks

I saw my boss David for the first time in a while today and he had somehow found out about the lack of hair washing. He takes the view that it is a revolting endeavour but seems to be quite relaxed about it taking place in his office. I told him about the horrified reaction of my parents and he thinks they are completely reasonable.

My friend Amy and I were discussing cows licks earlier. She was lamenting the fact she doesn't have one. I told her I'd only really realised for the first time that I have one, since I stopped washing my hair. For the first time in it's life it has been allowed to grow free and wild. You can kind of see the sideways thrust of the hair in the picture below but sadly it is not the sweet MJ from Desperate Housewives kind:

Eek, my picture after MJ's is not so pretty:



Sweet View

Well I rinsed the hair again today and the improvement is massive. It's a bit of waste though because all I've done is drive from Oxford to London, finish building a shed and work on my new company Sweet View. It launched today! Here is the live website: http://www.sweetview.co.uk/. Jack and I are dead excited.

Jack just came and looked at my head and said "Ooh hello Daniel... Druff!" Not even he finds that kind of joke funny, that's the sad thing.

Exeter

Today I went to Exeter to see my little sister, actress extraordinaire Lily Knight, in a play. She was playing Lady Bracknell in The Importance of Being Earnest and "stole the show" as one member of the audience said. People were very almost rolling in the aisles. Four stars, I'd say.

Anyway in the day, my parents, Lils, her boyfriend Jack, and I went for lunch in a slightly dodgy tapas restaurant called El Bocado. Salt and oil seemed to be the main ingredients of the paella. The quantity of oil was making me slightly nervous. I felt like I should have been eating salad and crispbreads. For some reason the hair was looking REALLY terrible. Every time I tried to take my bobble hat off my parents protested, even when it was really hot inside. They even tried to persuade me that I would have to wear it during the play. On the way home in the car, Mummy said about my lack of hair washing that it was "one of the most embarrassing things that has ever happened".

Here's me in a greasy stupor during lunch.

Date night

Jack and I went out to dinner to an extreeemely expensive restaurant tonight, called The Palm. The bill came to £140 but it was alright because they had sent me a £50 gift card (which was the only reason we went). But I think we were both feeling a bit edgy about the bill throughout dinner nonetheless. I just couldn't stop looking around at the other diners chomping away on their steaks who didn't have a £50 gift card. Mentalists. Great steak though.

I put on a lot of make up and a really nice dress but there was simply nothing to be done about the barnet. My friend Amy has just moved into my house. I think she's in the camp of people that doesn't really approve of the lack of washing. She looked a bit unsure about the clips I had put in so I took them out. Foolishly I took the whole outfit off before remembering to take a photo. So the spotty dressing gown features again...

Fringe

The hair is actually worse than it was yesterday. I'm worried that the photos on this blog aren't conveying a clear impression of the demise (and eventual rise!(hopefully)) of the state of the hair. The trouble is that now my hair has become very stiff and malleable it is surprisingly photogenic. You know how most of the Disney heroines have that hair:

(ooh two pictures in one post!) where the fringe swoops out at the front. Mine does a similar thing. Up close, of course, it's utterly rancid. But all I can say is that I don't think Ariel washed her hair with shampoo to get that kind of body in the fringe.

Here it is. I hope this captures something of the fetid nature of the hair as well as a sense of the malleable fringe element.

"Body"

There is definitely some improvement in the barnet department. Worsening dandruff, but that aside I think I'm starting to see some volume creeping back in. In fact, it's practically vertical from the roots on the top of my head. I swept it all up this morning over breakfast to demonstrate this to mummy but she just said "you shouldn't do that". Oh well... I thought she'd be impressed.

My colleague Anna was asking me this afternoon whether I thought it would begin to smell. I said I had read that was a complete myth. She then casually mused whether I would begin to smell like a dog or cat to which I FREAKED OUT! But when I went to kiss my dad this evening before going up to bed I think I actually detected him wincing and squirming his face away from hair. We were talking to my sister Ems on skype about my hair at the time and mummy leaned right into the webcam and said "it smells". This is a complete lie. I swear.

Anyway, the hair definitely has body, but it is very stiff and dry, in a way it hasn't been so far. A week ago it was absolutely sodden from the roots to the ends so there has definitely been a positive change. I decided to flatten it down a bit for the photo which doesn't do the increased voluminosity justice. I'll spruce it up tomorrow.

Dandruff

I was in the Gap changing rooms today when I noticed some tiny white dots on the top of my head: dandruff. I can't believe it- I was under the impression that the natural oils in my scalp would do my head a world of good. It's not very bad dandruff but it is still definitely there. I had noticed that my head had become quite itchy, especially when I was wearing my cycling helmet and I was spending most of the time at traffic lights trying to scratch my head through the holes in my helmet.

Still it's not all bad because before bed (10 minutes ago) I rinsed my hair again and it does now look quite a lot better. It definitely has increased body and manageability, almost like I've put moose in it. It still looks utterly dire, but I thiiink I can detect some improvement.

When I was in the shower I was having a good old think about the final episode of The Only Way is Essex and whether I preferred Mark or Kirk. I was thinking as well about all the girls and whether Lauren is nice or a bitch (that bit when she said at the boxing match "to think, I made love to Mark last night, it's so weird"- oh my god). And was she or was she not wearing a wedding dress to the fight?! Anyway, I was so engrossed in my thoughts and imagining dark brown girls with glossy blonde manes that I actually gave myself a fright when I got out of the shower and caught sight of my ghostly white face in the mirror.

Ikea trip

A rather late post because I didn't get back from late night shopping in Ikea until about 11:30 last night.

But here's a photo, which I did manage to take, just for the record. Hair: heinous as ever.

Sitting in, seeing no one

I decided to give my hair another rinse today and in fact it seems to have helped a bit. This is really disgusting but I think the grease was sort of melted and drawn down the length of the hair away from the roots. I haven't done much today though except sit in the house and work on mine and Jack's new business, which is called Sweet View. Here's the website in case you're interested!

Jack and I did try to go out into the pouring rain to finish building a shed I've bought to store our many bikes. We lasted about 10 minutes. With freezing and wet hands I was trying to hold up planks of wood to nail them on, whilst simultaneously trying to balancing an umbrella on my shoulder. After a bit there was a massive crash of thunder and we decided to go in. Other than that, a walk to Tesco to buy ice cream at 9pm was the only other time I stepped outside. What a great day!

Didn't really notice the hair today which was a blessed relief. Sitting in all day staring at computer screen and not seeing anyone seems to be the answer.

Hats

This morning I decided the time had come to don a hat, even when indoors. My hat of choice might have been better though- I went for my navy Isle of Skye beanie which is not the most flattering of hats. I tied up my hair and put the hat on so you couldn't see any hair at all. Jack said I looked like I had a disease. After a while of itching and scratching and feeling conscious of it all the time I asked him if I looked weirder with or without it and he said with. So that didn't last too long and plus I got really hot when I was in the house.

Later on I found a slightly better hat, a knitted cream affair. I put it on to go to my favourite shop, Fabrics Galore, a budget fabric shop in Clapham. This time I left my hair down underneath the hat which made me look a bit more normal. I still felt pretty self-conscious though and wasn't really able to respond to the shop assistant's banter much. Another customer, a really pretty girl, also started chatting to me and all I could think was 'don't look at me too closely!' I'm pretty sure that during the course of the conversation they both got a creeping sensation that I wasn't as normal as they had at first thought.

I have endeavoured to post a picture which really shows the depths of grease mongering I have reached. Slicking the hair back away from my face seems to be the only hairstyle available to me now.

Friday night

Towards the end of the working day, when I was the only one left in the office, my boss's son Hugo dropped in. I explained to him what I was doing and how I was hoping I wouldn't have to wash my hair any more after this 7 week period. He just said "it won't work". No one had ever had that reaction before and I have to say I don't think I had ever really contemplated outright failure. It made me feel QUITE worried.

After work I went down to the Southbank Centre to see some jazz and some friends. Sam told me my hair smelt like his dad's, which is frankly offensive to his dad. And Maddy said when she first saw me she thought I was ill. She's right- with so much dark, dull, stringy hair round my face I look utterly rough, and even more pale than usual. I have been considering fake tan but the idea of applying more greasy substances to the head area does not feel like a wise plan.

I also told my little sisters about the lack of hair washing. One of them, Lils, wrote back: "literally the funniest thing I have ever seen. 'lils, lils, do it with me. i promise you will look great, your hair will be so full and wavey!'.......EVIDENTLY NOT SISTER HOOD!!" So supportive. It is true though I did try to recruit her to the project but she is much too vain, as are most sane people.

Not a very informative photo but Ruby and I have the same cardigan and I have a penchant for matching stuff. Although now I think about it, it might not have been the best idea to set myself beside so much conditioned, celestial blonde-ness.

Dinner out

Tonight I went out for dinner with my friends Amy, Sas and Ty. The good news is that they didn't all recoil in horror upon seeing me, although it was pretty dark in the restaurant. I put this down to the excellent advice of my friend Jess to utilise the old hair band trick for greasy hair. There is simply nothing that can be done about the back of one's sopping head but from the front... not too bad!

They were mostly horrified that I had chosen to undertake this project in the run up to Christmas. Ty said I should have waited until January, and she's probably right. Still, I reckon I can headband my way right up to Christmas now.

I think I'd better go and take a shower. I think I might have been forgetting to wash altogether what with not doing my hair. Plus there's a terrible temptation to just rub the bar of soap over the top of my head. Just briefly.

Frightening off friends

Today was my first interaction with real people since I stopped washing my hair, other than colleagues, family or boyfriend. My friends Jess and Robbie came round for dinner. Robbie said: "It is pretty greasy". Jess wasn't too keen on hugging me. My dad actually said "Oh fuck" when we started talking about it. He can hardly bear to look at me and he is bordering on being furious. Both my parents try to persuade me to wash it every time the topic comes up.

This morning I rinsed the hair with water. The idea is that the grease is drawn down the lengths of the hair and eventually the scalp stops producing it. Daddy said he thought he was going to be sick when I told him this. Whilst it was wet I almost felt normal but it seemed to be almost impossible to dry my hair. Boyfriend Jack said it looked a lot better and I said that I thought he thought it was still wet from the shower, which it wasn't. He is very nice though because he doesn't care how I look. He has hippyish tendencies and always embraces a giant muff and a rustic attitude to hair removal in general. Although now I think about it he has been a lot more angry and shouty with me in the past couple of days than normal...

Jack?!

The Fear

I have become genuinely worried that I won't be able to go through with this. It's not so much that it looks terrible but that it FEELS awful. I daren't touch my hair and then my face for fear of inciting dermatological problems.

I also had a rare terrible day at work today and I can't help but see some vague connection between that and the fact I look like a Brylcreemed otter, but much less neat.

Day Two

Day two is another normal day. I'm entering the greasy roots with dry ends phase. I would normally give the hair a blast with dry shampoo on the days when I don't wash it, but luckily it really was raining today so it didn't matter too much. I also spent more than 50% of the day in a full tracksuit because it was raining so much I couldn't face cycling to work in my normal clothes, and I find that when you're looking rank anyway you may as well embrace a barnet on the turn.

In addition to this I forgot to take a second pair of shoes to work so I had to spend the working day in a pretty dress, tights, and enormous white trainers (size 7.5 thank you very much). Oh and also my knickers got soaked in the rain and I didn't have another pair so I had to go commando under my tights. Not nice.

An excellent day nonetheless. I had my first eggnog latte of the season from Starbucks and I said something quite good in my Spanish class. Anyway here's me on day 2.

                   

Pop-up blog

I will be writing this blog for the next seven weeks to track my experience of giving up shampoo and conditioner. This is surely of no interest to the outside world, but I am undertaking the project to help me get through the horrific process of quitting shampoo and looking, for seven weeks, like someone has poured a vat of baby oil mixed with wet-look gel over my head.

Until now I have washed my hair every other day. On the first day it looks alright- it's quite shiny and bouncy. It's fine. On the second day it is a lank mess. In my life I have often had people ask me "oh is it raining outside?" when it isn't.

Anyway, this idea came about when I read an article that was in the Daily Mail about people giving up washing their hair (p.s. the Daily Mail website is actually really good- I guarantee you will not be able to leave if you go on it). In the article the journalist quit washing her hair and after a few weeks her hair was looking beautiful and full of body, as they say. This woman had gone her whole life thinking she had straight hair, when in fact it was wavy. The drying effects of the shampoo had made her hair straight. I found this quite amazing and so I decided I had to try it.

I do also have some vague objection to the fact that we all really consider shampoo a vital part of life when in fact it's just... well actually what IS it? I suspect it's just fairy liquid mixed with perfume.

My parents are truly horrified by the concept of the shampoo ban (Mummy: "You will stink") and so I have struck a deal with them: if by Christmas day the barnet has not become wavy and bounteous and full of body, then I will wash it.

I'm going to post a photo every day to document the progress of the grease mongering. Here's the first one. (The hair is in a slightly man-with-long-hair phase, once it's lank and greasy I'm sure this will improve.)